Thresholds


Months ago, I went down to our local seed store (this is California, after all) and picked up some nasturtium seeds to plant in our balcony garden. I then proceeded to stare at the little packages every day, wanting to sow them in the little pots I had readied but afraid that, for whatever reason, they wouldn't come up.

Like the seeds, putting together this little space for myself on the internet has been on my mind for quite a while. Really it's an idea that I've entertained for years (and even halfheartedly attempted a couple of times). The truth is, though, I have a deeply rooted fear of failure - so every time I begin something new, I feel as though I'm about to jump off of a cliff. This makes starting new ventures a slow process as I hem and haw, running the pros and cons of every possible future. Meanwhile, the seeds sit idle and words go unwritten.

But I've started to wonder : what if I choose to view new beginnings as doors instead of cliffs? What if things don't have to be perfect from the start, if I can make it up and change my mind along the way? I can always retrace my steps and begin again. 

With that thought in my heart, I planted the seeds. And now I'm stepping over the threshold.